Critter Corner: The Loneliest Animals (2/3)

[Opening this year’s Critter Corner is a series by Ian Corbet, “The Loneliest Animals in the World”. Below is part two of three.]

Full Disclosure: Though this article is in the Just 4 Fun category, there is nothing fun in it.

A sad, lonely Isabelline Penguin is rejected by a “normal”.

We have all been endlessly indoctrinated with the phrase “Don’t judge a book by its cover.” At its heart, this is a beautiful sentiment that demonstrates an ideal: everyone should be fair and kind in his or her judgment of others. Sadly, these words of wisdom do not translate well into Penguan (the language of penguins and puffins) and because of this these flightless and apparently heartless birds have not accepted the message into their culture. From the nonchalant National Geographic photographer’s point of view, this fact proves inconsequential, as all penguins look like someone copied and pasted them all over a page of snow adding in an affirmative action-required seal here and there.

It is all well and good for these conformists, but the exclusive nature of the penguin community has caused the Isabelline Penguins to be treated like second-class citibirds. The Isabellines are a group of penguins who, due to a defective gene, have been born with brown plumage, instead of the black plumage that all those magazines say is the “must-have”. Because of this slight variation, Isabelline penguins are ostracized, forced to swim through the cold, unforgiving water in search of food that they will not need in order to regurgitate for everyone else.

Depression hurts these sad creatures and for once, Cymbalta can’t help. Isabellines are passed over every mating season, watching as the other happy pairs waddle away to the breeding ground together, hoping desperately to find someone like him or her and hating the fact that God has added insult to injury by allowing tear stains to stand out on brown plumage. This depressing cycle continues annually but- thankfully- not for too long, as the brown coloring allows the penguins to be easily spotted by predators. These penguins are therefore closer to the cold waters of death then any of their black contemporaries. There is a reason that no Isabellines were cast in Happy Feet.

– Ian Corbet, Arts Editor

Posted by on November 7, 2012. Filed under Just 4 Fun. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this entry

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